4 x 4 = 16

Overheard from a high school classmate many, many years ago.

Classmate 1: Naa ju’y nindot kaau nga bag-ong release ang Ford noh.

Classmate 2: Asa ana ba?

Classmate 1: Kana gud pick-up truck nila nga bag-o gawas, kanang FISO.

Classmate 2: Hala bayot, F-150 na oi, dili na FISO.


Nadunggan ni BANGGOY

Plurals

Female: Sus! Kibaw ka!? Nag-hubog si Mommy! Mura’g teenagers!

Himan: Mao bah? Ah daghan diay…

Suggest mo’g title beh!

Colegiala inside passenger jeepney. Covering her mouth with a very dainty hanky. She appears really sossy and sophisticated. Guy beside her trying to start a conversation.

Guy: Taga-Sanjo (San Jose) ka miga?

Colegiala (irked, almost shouting): Of course ba?

(Nisiga ang mata sa passengers. Quiet chuckles ensued.)


Nadunggan ni satchmo

Signs “R” Us

himantayon.com


Nakit-an ni “B”

Sukol ka?

Not so Holy Week…

While on vacation in one of Cebu’s provinces, a couple of kids taunts a group of gay guys, screaming: “Bayot, Bayot!”

Designer: “Tawga unya pa-ari-a inyong mga amahan kay akong tilawan!”

Not quite finished…

Designer: “Kung mobalik to sila ugma, siyagiti: ‘Bahala’g bayot, basta inyong mga amahan akong gilub*t!”


Nadunggan ni Jules

Sure ka na ba?

Overheard in an elevator in Manila.

Girl 1: “Ano ba talaga ang correct pronunciation, confirmed or confeermed?”

Girl 2: “Ano ka ba, magkaiba yun! Confirmed, kapag ok pa lang. Confeeremed kapag sure na sure na.”


Nadunggan ni Jules

The Breath of Life

In a youth gathering:

Guy 1: (catching his breath) Hahahaha! du^! Ay na sig katawa du^! Di na ko kaginhawa du! Hahaha!

Guy 2: Gi lang du^! Tagaan lang tikag mouth to mouth breath!

Guy 1: HAHAHA! Bogo! Unsay mouth to mouth breath? Mouth to mouth RECITATION na oi!


Nadunggan ni gladyth.

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Himantayon: A True Story

chronicles the limits of our humanity -- in pure, unadulterated Cebuano. We don't mean to eavesdrop, but some people are just too darned loud. Bato-bato sa langit, ang maigo, ayaw'g ka-panic!

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